that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize