Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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