I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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