Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
