youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
