I want to stick my p in your. b.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
