When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
her vagine was all disorganized.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
