I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
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