I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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