What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Little spoons don't ask big questions
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Randomize
