"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
