Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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