how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
