my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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