It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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