All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
