I feel like abortions should bother me more
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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