this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
