sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
4 words: hood of his car
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
how drunk are you?
Several
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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