your thong is hanging out like whoa
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
