naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
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