Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
