1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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