Can Purell be used as lube?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Boobs are out for the taking
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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