Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
