Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
