I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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