And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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