BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
