Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
It's just like the Real World with babies
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
