why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
