Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize