She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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