The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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