what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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