Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize