It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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