he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
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I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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