Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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