he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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