and she was petting her beer can
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
