Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize