I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
