someone get that fucking seahorse.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
