So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Dear god my vagina.
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