the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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