Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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