They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
