the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
