I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You're earring is so big in my mouth
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
