what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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